semana santa.

two weeks ago three friends and i went on a trip for spring break. here's what happened*.

the trip started off well enough. we spent two nights in madrid, which was pretty good. good in that i'm glad we were only there for two days; i can check madrid off the "seen" list and i don't really want to go back. i guess it was just underwhelming for me. the first evening we walked to the "parque del buen retiro". in one of our travel books it said that they held huge 100-man drum circles on sunday nights. what we found was much less than that. there were tons of people in this park, but not really hundreds of drum players, more like a few groups of ten or fifteen people banging on drums. it was still pretty cool. there were lots of vendors and street performers, so it was fun to walk around, but nothing i would leave the states to come visit you know? later that night we headed to the puerta del sol, the main downtown plaza of the city. and again, underwhelmed. we walked around a long time it seemed, looking for a bar area or even just one bar to sit down and have a coke. but we came on nothing good. the best part of the night came when the four of us played the leg game on a bench on one of the busiest streets in madrid. we faced away from the street, all with one leg crossed over the other, and when pedestrians passed us, we would switch crossed legs in unison. and then kevin and blake held their hats out for euros. the young people usually laughed, old folks usually scowled, and the one group of asians that passed us gave us 1 euro. holler.

the next day we went on a free walking tour of the city. that was nice, cause we knocked out most of the big tourist sites in three hours or so. the most impressive thing we saw was for sure the royal palace. if i was ever to go back to madrid, going inside is about the only thing i'd like to do. underwhelming is the best word i can think of to describe the city. everytime we came on a new building or something, the tour guide was like "you've seen the sacré-cœur or notre dame in paris? you've seen big ben in london? this is madrid's version of it." and none of the things we saw came even close to comparing with the other places he named. but whatever. we saw the city which was good. after the tour, we went and bought some groceries for dinner to cook in the hostel kitchen, then we headed back and took a nap. afterward, we made some ridiculously good spaghetti. highlight. after dinner we went on another search to find a bar area, with slightly better luck than the night before. after celebrating st. patrick's day for awhile, we headed back to our hostel to make a big decision. our flight to valencia left in the morning at 7:30, and the shuttle that was coming to pick us up was gonna come at 5:00, so we could either go to sleep, and wake up really tired, or just stay up all night and see what happened after that. we went with the latter. terrible decision. we spent the night playing 31, a card game kevin taught us, with this cool portugese girl we met in the hostel. and then we left for the airport at 5. just thinking about how tired i was makes my body ache.

the airport was basically a haze of tiredness. we did get an hour of sleep on the flight though, which was nice. our first order of business upon arrival was to find tyler and then the beach. as soon as we came up into the city from the underground metro, i immediately liked what i saw. there was nothing super special, i just had a better feeling about the city than i had about madrid, or any other spanish city i've been in for that matter.

we found tyler, dumped all our stuff minus towels in a locker and headed for the beach. the beach was such a beautiful sight for sore eyes. the sand was so soft and fine, there were hardly any waves, and we were flanked on either end of the beach by mountains. gorgeous. we napped on the beach for a few hours, all woke up with some serious sun, then headed off to find a grocery store for dinner. as soon as we got dinner supplies, we rounded the corner of the grocery store and saw the city of the arts and sciences, the biggest science museum in spain. this is a picture of two of the five buildings that make up this killer museum. i fell in love with this place three years ago when i did a report on it for my first spanish class at iowa. seeing it was so cool too. we ate our dinner right off of the biggest building in the set of five main structure. very cool. then we walked around and i took lots of pictures. it kind of sucked because i sort of felt like we were there just cause i wanted to see it, so i didn't want to stay too long. it was still way way cool though.

here's where we ran into a bit of a problem. first off, semana santa is a huge deal in spain, and certain cities have bigger than average celebrations. valencia is one of these cities. the festival they celebrate is called "las fallas", and it basically consists of building gigantic, elaborate, extravagant cardboard/wooden/paper mache statues and burning them on wednesday night. the first picture is of a man-sized falla, and the second is of the same falla close-up. since we didn't start looking for places to stay until two weeks before the break, we ended up not being able to find a hostel. so we were "sin techo" (literally, without a roof) for two nights. not a good situation to be in. it's such a weird feeling though, knowing that you really don't have anywhere to go, anywhere to sleep. it's like all sense of time and schedule are thrown completely out the window. by the time we left the museum it was dark, so that was really when i tried to put on my game face. my main goal at this point was just make it to daylight again. so we started to wander. kevin suggested we hit the wal-mart type store and buy some playing cards. after that, we walked for a long time trying to find the concentrated bar area. again, no luck. we ended up on a street corner by some outdoor party or something. four americans, sunburned and cold, with towels around their heads to keep the wind out, playing cards on a street corner and drinking wine and soda. what a bunch of lowlifes. after we got too cold to keep playing, we decided to keep walking. we ended up finding a huge mass of people, and i'm not just talking like a decent sized crowd, i mean probably thousands of people in this gigantic plaza watching this huge fireworks display in the sky. this wasn't your average small town fireworks show either, this thing was killer. just like a really concentrated twenty minutes of fireworks. sweet.

this is where things got a bit out of hand for me. most of the tons and tons of people in the crowd were drinking at this point, and quite a few of them had fireworks. fireworks and alcohol do not mix well to me. the next hour or so was us sitting around, watching people recklessly handle fireworks. it was actually decently scary. and exciting. the picture here is blake goofing off, just before someone let a firework go that flew through the crowd and hit the girl right next to me in the chest. she was fine. but that was about all i wanted to deal with. so blake and i decided we had had enough of drunks with fireworks so we walked around the city for like an hour looking for a metro stop. we ended up meeting tyler and kevin back at the beach around 6 am or so, and kevin greeted us with the news that beach patrol was out and we couldn't sleep on the beach until daybreak, for about another hour and a half. that was terrible news. plus it was cold. like way colder than we were expecting. so the other guys hid/slept in shadows, and the cold prevented me from sleep so i sat and watched the sunrise over the beach. it was actually really pretty/miserable. around 7 or so, blake woke up and we decided to go ride the above-ground metro to get warm again. this ended up being a genius idea because it was free and warm and we were undisturbed for a good two hours. we probably rode the whole metro route in a big circle like three or four times. around 9 or so, we headed back to the beach and slept. this was phenomenal sleep for me. i woke up around 1 or 2 in the afternoon, tanned and rested better than i would've thought.

we all woke up crazy hungry, so we headed off in the direction of the grocery store. we got there and found it was closed since wednesday was the biggest day of las fallas celebration. horrible. luckily, there was a burger king around the corner which was open. that was one of the best double bacon cheese burgers i've ever had in my life. it was right around this time that the bombs started going off around town to herald the start of the big las fallas finale day. right outside burger king while we ate, someone set off like a million fireworks that basically just turned to smoke and totally surrounded the restaurant. it was crazy to see, looking out the window it looked like we were in a war zone. crazy.

after burger king, we walked around the city of the arts and sciences once more, and then we walked through the city up the big dried up riverbed turned huge walkway/city park. it was very cool. we ended up finding the city center, where they had the biggest falla statue. it was a gigantic genie looking thing; reminded me of exactly of the genie from aladdin when jafar has control of him. all gigantic and sad looking. pretty intense. by this time it was around 6 or 7 in the evening so we wandered a bit before finding another burger king and deciding to park it there while we played some more cards and killed a bit of time. the gigantic end finale burning of the genie started at 1 am so we had the evening to get through. after burger king we found a bar close by another big falla statue, and we stayed there until they set this smaller statue on fire. and it was awesome. when it was finally lit up, there was a big crowd really close by, and as soon as it really caught on fire, huge heat waves just radiated out into the crowd and we all moved backward together, it was awesome. after seeing this one go up in flames, we found our way through the intensely packed crowd to our new positions to see the colossal genie burn. it was crazy too, once the crowd really got packed in, there was absolutely no movement possible. like literally, we were shoulder to shoulder close. and we had to wait like that for almost an hour before the genie burned. but once it did, wow. they started off with fireworks shot into the sky, and then once that thing went up in flames, oh man it got so hot. i just realized i have no good pictures of the actual burning of any fallas, only videos. as soon as i figure out how, i will post as many of my videos on facebook as i can.

so that was the end of las fallas. we headed back to the bus station to collect our things and then i went with two of the other guys to the train station for me to wait for six hours for my train to leave and for the other guys to try and find train tickets back to oviedo. by the end of the six hours, blake and eric had gone back to the bus station (there were no available trains that day) and i was left for the last hour and a half before my train left. i started by journaling a little and then when i realized there was no way my eyes would stay open i walked around as much as i could. i explored the whole train station and then walked around the neighborhood since the sun had risen. around twenty minutes until my train boarded, i tried to sit down and my eyes immediately closed and my brain shut down so i had to stay standing up so as not to fall asleep and miss my train. but i made it on, slept the four hours to madrid, navigated the metro to the bus station, got on my bus and slept for another five hours back to oviedo. and then i slept that night for almost twelve hours. completely phenom. it was the perfect ending to this long, long trip.

so madrid kind of sucked, valencia was great, homelessness is awful, and i don't like partying. and fire is dangerous. it was a good trip, a very good experience for me to have, and i'm glad it's over now. today marks the start of my first real week of school since break started. two weeks off is nice, but it wrecks havoc on my productivity. but you've gotta start somewhere. come on monday, let's do this.

-jon

* possibly the worst intro to a blog i've written yet.

blowing smoke.

i love this article.

South By Southwest: Welcome To Hipster Nation
Our writer makes a disturbing discovery on his way to Austin, Texas: He's a Hipster.
By James Montgomery

On The Record: Welcome To Hipster Nation. It's Pretty Dumb Here.

Terminal 6 at John F. Kennedy International Airport is positively seething with irony right now, filled with guys and gals who are all trying very hard to look like they're not trying very hard at all. Everyone is headed down to Austin, Texas, for South by Southwest, and everywhere you look, there is stubble, matted hair, tattered and unwashed denim, big glasses (prescription and otherwise), scuffed loafers, ratty cardigans, crooked collars, Day-Glo tights, headbands and all manner of American Apparel-inspired lunacy.

Generally speaking, everyone here either looks, a) homeless; b) mentally challenged; or c) both. Which means that I am officially jealous of all of them. Because no matter how ridiculous they all look, they also look totally great, like emaciated, unwashed models in $1,200 jeans, fresh from shooting heroin into their eyeballs or visiting some designer-sneaker boutique in Japan or making out with each other or taking photos of some band that I've never heard of. They are the standard-bearers of Hipster Nation, which is as much a state as it is a state of mind, one I cannot begin to comprehend, despite the fact that I desperately want to.

No matter how much I try to deny it, I am envious of everyone here, which makes me realize a couple of things about myself. First and foremost, I am rather petty, sort of shallow and really judgmental. But secondly — and most importantly — I am exactly like all these people. I am a Hipster, and I am awful.

Come to think of it, this same thing tends to happen to me every March, when I leave my Brooklyn enclave and head south to Texas for SXSW. I am usually fine until I get to JFK, and head to Terminal 6 (the JetBlue hub, which makes sense, because JetBlue is totally the Hipster airline. Not only do they have a New York Times channel and Terra Blues chips and an official sommelier, but on my flight Tuesday, they were actually showing "Juno"). There, I start to notice all the glasses and the thrift-store clothes and the skinny girls and even skinnier guys. And all the iPods and iPhones and MacBook Pros. And I realize that I am not alone. I am not even unique. I am just another Hipster.

From there, it only gets worse. The flight down to Austin is like a white-earbud bonanza, everyone hammering away on Macs or reading some interior-design magazine like Dwell. I want to hate them all, only I am doing the exact same thing (also, I am legitimately considering spending $900 on an organic-cotton duvet cover). If the plane were to crash, several graphic-design firms would certainly be forced to close up shop, and countless blogs would go unblogged.

Once SXSW gets rolling, every BBQ joint and ironic dive bar from Cesar Chavez to San Jacinto is crawling with dudes who look exactly like me. Sixth Street teems with skinny jeans and ironic mustaches and girls in tights and cowboy boots. Every band playing in every venue looks exactly the same: all unshaven and unwashed and unspeakably white (honestly, when Ghostface played SXSW in 2006, I wanted to ask him if he was lost and needed directions). For a week, Austin is overrun by Hipster Nation. We swallow the town up like a swarm of locusts in really dumb costumes, unapologetically stripping it bare of everything before buzzing back to Williamsburg or Portland or Silver Lake or Baltimore (or wherever the "new" Williamsburg/Portland/Silver Lake/Baltimore is ... Tampa, maybe?).

In the midst of this, I inevitably have some sort of Hipster Panic, because I don't want to be like these people — only I fear it might be too late. I am writing this column on my iBook G4 (I'm retro), while listening to Paul Simon's Graceland on my iPod (I only bought it because I really like the Vampire Weekend record). I own both a cell phone and a BlackBerry, and I'm on them constantly, which means that I'm really considering buying an iPhone. I am wearing thrift-store loafers and skinny jeans from Top Shop, a white V-neck T-shirt and an old Army jacket. My hair isn't combed, my face is unshaven. I have a gold Casio digital watch on my wrist, which my wife bought for me at a shop on Bedford Avenue in Brooklyn. On two occasions, Leslie Feist has told me she owns the same timepiece.

This week in Austin, I will attend parties thrown by Scion, Vice magazine, Levis, eMusic, PureVolume, The Onion, Rhapsody and The Fader, to name just a few. All of them are organized by companies/publications that realize that I am nothing more than a member of a rather desirable demographic — one with disposable income to burn on disposable crap, and one that cherishes research-group buzzwords like "authenticity" and "individualism" — and, as such, each party is carefully designed to gain maximum exposure in decidedly unthreatening, totally authentic forums ("The Ting Tings killed it at the Levis/Fader Fort! And they had PBR and carne-asada tacos too!" raves HoodiesAndGlasses.Blogspot.com).

And that's what probably makes me the saddest of all ... not the fact that my "scene" has been corrupted by the corporations (it's not 1989, man. These days, the idea of selling out seems positively antiquated), but rather that no one I know seems to realize this. There's an inherent sense of "the individual" in Hipster Nation, only it's not very difficult to see — whether it's down in Austin for SXSW or at Lollapalooza or in a commercial for iPod Nanos — that there are no individuals anymore. We all think, look, act and consume in exactly the same way. We are all a target market. We all listen to the same sh--ty bands, display the same sh--ty attitudes, wear the same sh--ty clothes and read the same sh--ty blogs. We're no different, really, than the mindless sheep we poke fun at for going to Nickelback shows or shopping at Abercrombie & Fitch, despite how superior we'd like to think we are (and at least they support artists they like by actually buying their albums).

So basically, it's all a colossal waste of time. All of it. Hipster Nation sucks. We should all go build something with our hands or move to the suburbs or dig a ditch or vote Republican or something like that (and do these things without the faintest trace of irony), because at least that way, we'd be somewhat different, because we'd be contributing something. Being cool is pretty much pointless. And that realization is going to be the Jiminy Cricket that I carry with me all week down at SXSW, whether I'm furiously blogging about the Jay Reatard show I just went to or trying on complimentary pairs of Levis and Pumas. I will rage against the machine, overthrow the nation, burn my Mac. I will make a difference ... someday. In the meantime, maybe I'll just write an angry blog about it all. Or perhaps Twitter the revolution. Have my friend do up a sweet logo from home. Throw a fundraiser that Beach House and the Black Kids will play. You know, get "viral" with it ...


this is a phenomenal article for so many reasons. it nails the whole idea, the whole culture of the indie hipsters so perfectly. and it's always been a movement that's turned me off so much. there's just something about it that i don't like. the whole culture is based on the idea of not blending in, not conforming to what society wants, not becoming cliqueish. and it's become exactly what it originally deplored. the indie hipsters have their own language, their own music, their own clothes, their own subculture. it's amazing. you can spot them on the street. that's exactly what the whole movement started against. i guess that's why i don't like. it's so arrogantly exclusive and at the same time it's so easy to become a part of it.

it's always seemed competitive to me, in a completely unspoken way. if you don't know about this new hip band or this cool art house movie director, you aren't as in. you have to love "ok computer", vans, wes anderson (and not just love, but really Get his movies), american apparel, wayne coyne, mac, square-rimmed glasses, jack kerouac, and skinny jeans. it is it's own culture now, and these kids are all the same, just like all the frat boys and sorority girls are the same, just like all the college freshmen who love really black rap are the same, just like all the theater geeks and band members and glee club singers are the same, just like all the hot topic shoppers are the same. the problem with the indie hipsters is that they don't seem to get this. i get the feeling that they think they're above social groups, they've found a way to transcend all that hokum and be their own person. but they've done exactly the opposite. they've created their own very specific subculture. and they've managed to clique themselves off far worse than all those other groups. the hipsters are so unapproachable because they look down on everybody else for "conforming", for falling into these social groups.

it's frustrating too because the hipsters seem so specific about what they like. and they laugh at you if you like something else, something mainstream. now let me be the first to say, i think nickelback sucks, and i hate hot topic. i'm not even a huge american eagle or aeropostale fan (i do like aeropostales jeans though). but i understand their merit. i understand that nickelback's music means something to some people, some people just like t-shirts with cheesy little logos like a dinosaur and the words "never forget" or a shirt with some classic throwback logo, like with an old school NES controller on it or something. i get that. i personally do not ascribe to it, i think it's all pretty dumb, but at the very least i understand that other people like it, and they're entitled to their own belief about their material world. but the hipsters are bad about it. not only do they hate nickelback, they hate nickelback fans. they're so arrogant. a long time ago i read an article in spin magazine about lenny kravitz, and lenny and the interviewer were at some club somewhere and lenny saw john mayer dancing and he went over and they talked for a moment, and the interviewer follows up with this:

"Who's that?" I shout over the din.
"That's John Mayer," Kravitz shouts back.
I recognize the name and know that he's famous, but I'm not sure why. "Is he a musician?" I shout.
"Yeah, he's a great guitar player."

honestly, who works as a reporter for a music magazine and doesn't know who john mayer is? it's written in such a subtle, pompous way. i know i'm a bit biased because it's john mayer, but in general, once the hipster nation deem someone unimportant or irrelevant, that's how they will always be looked at by the hipsters. in the case of john mayer, the hipsters think wonderland was an awful song, and as soon as it was reinforced by daughters, that was the nail in their john mayer coffin. he is no longer a talented musician to them, and never really will be. it's things like this that bug me about them.

the other thing that bugs me about them is that they're so arrogant about what they like, what they are into, when in reality, a lot of their stuff just plain sucks. the latest thing to be lauded by the hipsters (and granted, by everybody else too) is the movie juno. it's the story of a 16 year old girl who gets pregnant and decides to give the baby up for adoption. the hipsters love it because it's full of sharp wit and critical acclaim and the main character loves iggy and the stooges. and it has the most hipsterish soundtrack i've heard in a long time.

but let me start with the movie. i don't know what it is about it, i didn't like it all that much. it just seemed too contrived. nobody talks like that, that fast or quick witted. nobody says "honest to blog", and i wouldn't find it funny if someone did. it's like they talk like the gilmore girls, except with an hour and a half of film, you don't have enough time to really invest in the characters like you can with gilmore girls. the only thing that saved this movie for me was bleeker, played by the incomparable michael cera. this young guy is the hottest new scene stealer in hollywood. every time he shows up in juno, the film gets sweeter and funnier and better. but other than that, i give it a shrug of the shoulders. it's just not that funny. and it might've carried some emotional weight for me had there not been the mildly creepy sideplot of the older musician/husband. or if there had been more michael cera. more of his relationship with juno would've made the teary hospital bed scene at the end so much better. but honestly, what 16 year old girl exists like juno? it's too hard to believe. yet all these hipsters loved it. the best movie of the year they said. whatever. maybe it wasn't the movie itself that i disliked so much, but rather all the acclaim it received. nominated for best picture? are you kidding me? the academy could've potentially put juno in a class among other films such as the sound of music, the sting, the godfather parts I & II, annie hall, braveheart, schindler's list, forrest gump, etc.? juno, the smart mouth knocked up 16 year old? i don't think so. it was a decent movie, but nowhere near this calibur.

and the soundtrack. yikes. it was getting high marks from critics left and right and it shot to #1 on the itunes download top ten albums. why? who knows. word of mouth, the hipsters not wanting to get left out of the loop i guess. no hipster wants to be the last hipster to be "in" on the hot new hipster trend. but about the soundtrack itself, there are a few good songs on it, but overall, it's dominated by this kimya dawson woman. where in the world did she come from with her lyrics that don't rhyme? from her songs on the soundtrack, she just sounds like a singer who can't really sing. her music is simplistic, and not in the good way. it's like there's nothing there. it sounds so vacant to me. and her lyrics. i don't think i have a problem with lyrics that don't rhyme, but it bugs me when it's so obvious. if you can disguise the fact that your lyrics don't rhyme with the way they blend into the melody and music, then great. but if you're singing in your almost-talking voice words like:

"i took the polariod down in my room
i'm pretty sure you have a new girlfriend
it's not as if i don't like you
it just makes me sad whenever i see it."

ok now there is a difference between having conversational lyrics (see any song written by ben folds) and just having words that should be spoken rather than sung. just bugs me. and legit, the rest of that song that i just quoted isn't nearly as bad as that one verse, but overall i just don't like the way her songs sound. they've got a lot of this kind of feeling. doesn't sit well in the ears.

to be fair, i only gave the soundtrack one legitimate listen, aside from hearing it during the movie. once really isn't enough to get what all the hipsters got, so i'm probably talking mainly out of my butt. but it just didn't appeal to me. and a lot of their culture doesn't appeal to me, which is probably why i dislike it so much. but who am i? just a guy who'd like to think he can't be pigeon-holed into a certain culture group, but obviously i can. i wear the same clothes and loads of other college kids and listen to the same music and watch the same shows. social cliques are such a weird thing. nobody thinks they want to be in one but inevitably, everybody falls into some social category. and that's life. so why am i calling this one group out? cause i had a few extra minutes and a chip on my shoulder about some kids who think they're better than other kids? basically. i will say one thing though. i am really looking forward to the day my second kid turns 15 and i can start wearing whatever i want because i'm a middle aged dad. no one holds them culturally accountable for anything. what a great way to live.

-jon

let's bowl.

two days ago, two friends of mine and i went out to a big mall a ways away (that sounds much better saying it than it looks writing it.) from our houses. it's far enough away that we had to take a bus. i didn't really know how big this mall was gonna be, but it was way bigger than i expected. unfortunately, since it was still spring break/semana santa, all the stores were closed except the restaurants and the arcade. however, we did stumble upon something phenom. a bowling alley.

we threw down money for two games and bowled for awhile. and it was awesome. i haven't bowled for real for a long time, not since i've become awesome at wii bowling. the first frame was rough, my brain wasn't expecting to be holding a 14 lb. ball but rather a ~1 lb. wii controller. but after that, i did alright. and mainly because of wii bowling, which surprised me. my average on wii is like 200, maybe 210 if i've been playing for awhile. but playing for real, i couldn't always throw the ball exactly how i wanted, cause i'm clumsy and my arms are too long and i don't have a lot of upper body strength, but every throw i knew exactly where i wanted it to go. all cause of wii. interesting that a video game system has finally been made that is beneficial to real skills. i wonder if i'd be any baseball or golf now. doubt it.

so we played two games, eric won the first one, and i played a real clutch game and won the second one. it was fun. and they have way cooler animations after you throw. the two best ones i remember were both for spare pick-ups. one involved a bowling pin dinosaur eating ferns, and in the background is this big volcano. all of a sudden the volcano explodes and a gigantic bowling ball rock completely smashes the dinosaur, and then a little bit of green goo oozes out from under the ball. even more graphic, the other one was in a dark alley, and you see three pins in trenchcoats walking menacely towards a bowling ball, and out of nowhere, i don't remember if he shoots them or kicks them or knifes them or what, but the bowling ball does something sweet and all the pins get blown back out of the picture and on the back alley wall appears a huge bloodstreak X! gruesome. we got a good laugh out of it though.

it's a bummer to me that the only "sports" i think i'm decently good at are sports that no one cares about. bowling, ping pong, foosball, frisbee golf. what? who's even heard of these, much less wants to spend time watching them? you can't really name drop ping pong and have people be impressed. these are mainly sports that skill comes in handy at family reunions, holidays, etc. so that's at least good. i might not be able to contribute to a 5 on 5 game of hoops at the gym, but when we get back to the bells house for round robin, i'm ready. bring it on greg.

-jon

influences.

first off, i want you to watch this video. nothing could be better than starting a blog with this treasure:



i'll get to that later. moving on...

i love artistic influence. let me explain what i mean. on days when i have absolutely no obligations, there is nothing more enjoyable than spending hours at a time reading blogs, watching youtube videos, checking people's websites. granted, i am specific in all this; i'm not just a random youtube searcher or anything like that. i don't waste my time with crap. i love catching up with my entertainment world heroes. i enjoy it when these big stars, people whose creative work i greatly admire, put time into something personal like a blog or an interview that's on youtube or something like that. i love taking one of my favorite stars and checking their myspace, to see if they've posted a goofy new video or giving us a little glimpse of some new project they're working on. you have to understand the distinction though, because it's important. i don't like following up on who's dating who, who was seen at this club, look at how much this person spent on clothes and cars for their latest music video. that stuff is obnoxious and wasteful. i care about real artistic creativity. and i don't mind if it's a comedian or a singer or an architect or whatever. as long as it's somebody whose work i respect and i am seeing a bit of their thought process, the way they view their craft and the way they're committed to creativity, i absolutely love it.

i am mainly writing about john mayer here. for about the last two months or so, i have been getting really excited for whatever john mayer is doing next musically, because from keeping up with his blog, you can learn so much of what is going into his next record. and it's incredible how diverse this guy's influences are. first of all, his blogs are the most well-thought, well-written, personal, funny, creative, celebrity blogs i've stumbled onto. some of his posts are the most random ever (this is just one of numerous examples.)(<-you can click that, it's not a virus or anything. all the links in this blog are legit, i put them all up, and there are a ton of them, all of which i suggest you check out.) and some of his posts are much more personal, giving the reader a small window into his heart or his head. and i love that. he's so candid about what influences him. here is a run down of (to me) the most important blogs he's posted in the last few months.

(in chronological order):
1. Nov. 20th, 07 - Pop Rocks (read it here.)
this is a long ways back, but it's such gold, i can't not let you know about it. it's just a few words from john mayer about his then-current favorite songs on the radio. i love this guy as a writer, he puts things exactly how i would like to put things. in fact i'm usually jealous he beats me to the perfect thought. here though: "They're great. Not 'actually' great, as in I expected them to suck and I'm reluctantly giving it up' great." such a great thought. too many people talk about pop music this way. i hear it most when i tell people i like justin timberlake, and they reply with "oh yeah that new single he's got is actually really great." of course it is. you didn't need to throw in actually. who are all these haters expecting pop music to suck so bad? i also want to echo john's sentiment about the songs by paramore, sara bareilles, and alicia keys. all awesome tunes. i do want to give a big thumbs down to the jordin sparks song though. "you're on my heart like a tattoo"...? i heard it once and that was enough. other than that though, i think he's right on with this blog.

2. Jan. 9th, 08 - Comedy Cellar (read it here.)
so simple. consists of a sentence and a half and three pictures. and it gets me so excited. he saw two of the greatest stand-up comedians of our time at a small venue in new york and posted this. neither of these comedians are working on anything big right now; no big stand-up tours, no tv shows. yet they are still two of the best the generation before mine produced, and to see them together is exciting for this day and age. it's exciting to see two giants interact when so much of what is out there today is no good. the other reason this is exciting to me is because it's affecting john mayer in the way he views stand-up and writing. for the last year and a half john mayer has been dabbling in stand-up comedy, occasional doing a short set at the comedy cellar in the new york or appearing on radio and talk shows as a sit-down guest rather than a musical guest. at first i didn't know what to think about it, but as i learned more about why he's doing it, it's so intriguing to me. stand-up comedy appeals to this guy because so much of his essence is a writer. he's a phenomenal musician of course but writing is such a huge part of who he is. and stand-up comedy is such a different vein of writing than writing lyrics or notes is. and to be good at something, it's important to look at it from every different angle possible; to examine it from all sides and to learn it back and forth and inside out. this stand-up venture is his attempt to better himself as a writer. and that's exciting. this just kills me though, "more musical than most music..." the way john mayer views creativity fascinates me. he doesn't seem constrained by any kind of fixed design of how to be creative or how to create. he takes in as much as he can, digests it, absorbs what he can, and his work is so much the better for it. this is the reason continuum was such an exceptional album; you can hear his influences in every single song, and yet all of it is so original. so that's why this blog is great.

2. Jan. 14th, 08 - Messin Round (read it here.)
this is a very, very exciting blog to me. one of my Top 5 Favorite Artists being directly influenced by another one of my Top 5 Favorite Artists. "Starting to get back into the production head, searching for new sounds on a Sunday afternoon..." and what he goes to for new sounds is justin timberlake. does this excite anyone else? especially because he is taking the best part of one of the best songs off futuresex/lovesounds and covering it. and it sounds amazing. going back to the "pop rocks" blog, i loved what he said about this tune because he actually did specify that the interlude was the best part of the song and i don't know, i just think that's a cool, important distinction to make, and it really makes me think he is keeping a very very close eye on pop music. so keep listening to that stuff john. it will only make you better.

3. Jan. 25th, 08 (read it here.)
not so much a blog about influences, but just a picture that keeps us aware that he is still a musician, and making music is still his passion. and what a killer studio too. whatever record he comes up with next will sound amazing.

4. Feb. 15th, 08 - MacBook Air. Gumball 3000 / Ford GT Road Test (read part 1 & part 2.)
the gumball 3000 is a gigantic car "race" among celebrities. a more accurate description is a bunch of rich celebrities take rich cars out, drive around the world together (literally around the world), and wine & dine together every night. basically a huge party for rich people, including lots of driving every day in ridiculously nice cars. and john mayer is going to be a part of it. the most exciting part of this blog for me is "Going to blog from the road from here [the honeyee blog site]..." this year the gumball 3000 is going to san diego, LA, las vegas, shanghai, beijing, just to name a few. how nuts is that? i guess i'm mainly excited about this because seeing the world is such a good experience for anyone. i know traveling will affect that guy somehow, which just means more good influences. and for real, look at that car. so awesome.

5. Feb. 22nd, 08 - Frank. (read it here.)
nothing makes me more excited about john's new music than this blog. it's good to know that he is keeping up with pop culture, keeping in touch with what's popular and what's current, but i feel so reassured after reading this that whatever new music he comes up with next, it won't suck. he's listening to frank. "... all i want is harmony." nothing pleases me more than reading this. his new album is going to be off the wall.

6. Feb. 23rd, 08 - John Cage's 4'33'' (read it here.)
while not as pleasing as the frank sinatra blog, this is still a really important one. my immediate thought was, "who cares about a 'piece' of music where nobody plays anything? how did this become famous?" but if you think about it in terms of each listener's experience, it's actually pretty cool. no two listeners will hear the exact thing from this piece. every single time you listen to it, it will be different. it's all about your environment, what you hear, what you experience as you listen to it. and that's a pretty cool thought. so while still not as cool as the frank blog, this one still gets me amped how this is all gonna add up in john's music.

7. Feb. 29th, 08 - Buddy Miles (read it here.)
just a quick one. it's significant because buddy miles never made it big in terms of america's pop culture. everyone knows jimi hendrix, maybe a quarter of everyone know buddy miles. the fact that john not only knows who he was, but also that he was funky? very good news. i knew buddy miles was the drummer for the band hendrix was in after the jimi hendrix experience, but i didn't know a single thing about him. i'm glad to know john knows he was funky. more musical influence.

8. Feb. 29th, 08 (read it here.)
this one i'm torn on. mainly because i don't like fall out boy, but i love michael jackson. and hearing that fall out boy covered michael jackson sucks, but hearing that john mayer covered the guitar solo in "beat it" is incred. it's also cool that at least john mayer has a varied music taste. he knows fall out boy well enough to give thumbs up to playing on their cover of a classic mj tune. overall i'd say the cover is dece. not anything crazy good, but alright. and john obviously kills it with the solo. i would love it if john blogged about mj, that would blow my freakin' mind.

9. Mar. 14th, 08 - A Pure Moment (read it here.)
i like this one because this is life. obviously i might not be able to go to japan, but i can have that same soul-cleansing moment, just wherever i'm at. i understand that moment. it's something i'm always looking for, trying to find. sometimes i don't even think about it, but whether or not i realize i'm in it, it's one of the greatest feelings in the world. the awareness of the moment itself doesn't even matter, which is one thing i love about it. but this idea, the idea of this moment of pure happiness, is such a beautiful thought to me, it's such a romantic ideal in our heart-breaking world that to see a writer/musician that i admire and respect so much aspire to grasp that moment and own it in his life and in his music and in his work, it's so refreshing and exciting to me. a few years ago he wrote a song about this moment; it is my absolute favorite he's ever written. to know that this concept is still important in his head and his heart is encouraging to me; i'm not worried about what he's gonna come up with next in terms of music. it's gonna be great.

10. Mar. 19th, 09 - Report (read it here.)
this is a funny little blog with something good inside. he mentions the newest radiohead album in passing, but says he listened to it straight for two weeks and then hasn't listened to it since. interesting. in the last year or so i feel like john's mentions of radiohead have really increased. during concerts, he added radiohead/thom yorke lyrics to his own songs, he posted a thom yorke music video along with the lyrics, and has mentioned them on other occasions. radiohead is such a weird group. to say the very least, it'll be interesting to see what kind of affect their music has had on john's music.

11. Mar. 22nd, 08 - Giant Steps (read it here.)
i'm glad i waited to post this blog until tonight because john just posted something else super great up. two videos of the song "giant steps" by john coltrane. the first video is SUPER cool. again, just another facet of music that john is absorbing. so great.

12. Mar. 19th, 08 - Billy Preston, Ray Charles: "Agent Double O Soul" (read it here.)
this is out of chronological order, but i'm saving this one for last because it's a such good finale. possibly my favorite post of this whole bunch. SUCH an incredible video. first of all, the title of the song is "agent double O soul". seriously? how could a song with a title like that even be remotely bad? ray just kills it on the piano, and billy preston... wow. his vocals are off the wall, that suit! unbelievably cool. and his moves! oh my goodness the way billy moves is just so fluid. like a freakin' blob of energy and soul on the stage. absolutely phenom. if i could dance like that... my goodness. none of these posts makes me happier about john mayer's upcoming music than this one. if this is the kind of music that is influencing him, i know he's got something good coming soon. this video is so freakin' awesome, go watch it again for your own good.

no other entertainer that i know of in show business lets their fans into their lives as much as john mayer. and not in a weird stalker "i wish i was famous so i'll follow famous people" kind of way but a really cool, fascinating, "this is what i'm into, what do you think?" kind of way. he's a guy that knows music so well, and his outlook on life is really unique, and seeing what he's into in tv, literature, travel, music, all this stuff is important to understand where he's been musically and where he's going. on the surface all this might seem like drivel, but to me it's so interesting because it's a glimpse into the way this guy's mind works. these are all little pieces of who he is, what drives his work, what makes his brain tick. so great. and i can't wait to see where all this stuff ends up. such an eclectic mix of media will certainly sum up to something great. keep an eye on this guy, he's going places.

-jon

read this first.

this is just a quick preface to the next blog. just for the aesthetic quality, i wanted to preface the next blog a bit but i didn't want the preface in the actual blog itself. so here it is. plus, upping the blog count all the time. anyway, i've had this idea for a long time: take one of my Top 5 Favorite ____ lists and write about each entry on the list. the only reason i'm starting with break-up songs is because it's one of the few Top 5 lists i actually have completed. i'm not depressed or anything. and i'm not breaking up with my lovely girlfriend colleen anytime soon (mark forstrom ref.) these are just songs that really get inside and mean a lot to me; these are songs that i will always keep coming back to because they have so much soul and meaning in them. they communicate such beautiful ideas and make me glad i have music in my life. more Top 5 lists will hopefully be on the way, but it will probably be a long time before i do another one. they're pretty time-consuming. i have it set up so the title/artist is first, followed by the lyrics of the song, followed by the actual song, and then finished off with my thoughts. this way, you can decide for yourself if you want to read through the song first or read while listening or whatever you want. so here you go.

-jon

Top Break-Up 5 Songs

#5: The Eraser - Thom Yorke

please excuse me but i've got to ask
are you only being nice
or do you want something
my fairy tale arrow pierces
be careful how you respond
so you don't end up in this song
i never gave you any encouragement
and it's doing me in
doing me in
doing me in
doing me in
doing me in

the more you try to erase me
the more, the more
the more i appear
the more, the more
the more you try to erase her
the more, the more
the more that you appear

you know the answer so why do you ask
i am only being nice
because i want someone, something
you're like a kitten with a ball of yarn
and it's doing me in
doing me in
doing me in
doing me in
doing me in

the more you try to erase me
the more, the more
the more i appear
the more, the more
the more i try to erase you
the more, the more
the more that you appear
no, you're wrong, you're wrong
you're wrong, you're wrong
you're wrong, you're wrong
you're wrong



such a fascinating song. what a hook. "the more you try to erase me, the more that i appear". this is such a heartbreaking aftermath of a relationship. when the two ex-lovers have had some time to try to move on, yet their skin hasn't hardened and their hearts haven't closed up completely. it's like you can almost tell this is just when the bitterness and anger really sets in. they're trying to be done with each other and trying to move on but it's not working. whatever is left of their love has turned into pain and it won't leave. the music here just kills me. it's the most electronic song on my list; listening closely i can only make out five basic tracks. during the chorus, this is what i can pick out:
1. the beat. straight from a computer.
2. the piano line. pretty basic, the same all the way through.
3. this is harder to hear, but some more electronic sounds/notes adding to the piano chords.
4. the vocal line singing the lyrics.
5. the vocal layering. aside from how brilliant the electronic-icity of this song is, this is what i think makes the music of this tune stand out for me. i love it because it makes the song stand out by being almost completely hidden. it doesn't show off. i'm so taken by the main vocal line and the piano part that i forget that underneath it all is this absolutely beautiful mix of so many different tracks of the singer's voice. it sounds like waves upon waves of thom yorke's voice just flowing in and around and through the rest of the song. so gorgeous. and it hides itself so well, just underneath everything so it's obvious to hear, but then you forget about it immediately when any other part of the song is heard. but it's still there, propelling the song on in such a smooth way. it's such a perfect contrast to the rigid and almost blemished electronic part of the song. you can hear static noise throughout the electronic parts, like you're listening to the song on a fuzzy radio station. it's a bit of a rough and imperfect noise, but combined with the seamless, fluid vocal layering, it hits the perfect spot. such a phenomenal song.



#4: Smoke - Ben Folds Five

leaf by leaf and page by page
throw this book away
all the sadness all the rage
throw this book away
rip out the binding and tear the glue
all of the grief we never ever knew
we had it all along
now is smoke
the things we've written in it
never really happened
all the things we've written in it
never really happened
all of the people come and gone
never really lived
all of the people come have gone
no one to forgive...
smoke

we will never write a new one
there will not be a new one
another one, another one

here's an evening dark with shame
throw it on the fire
here's the time i took the blame
throw it on the fire
here is the time we didn't speak
it seemed for years and years
here's a secret
no one will ever know the reasons for the tears
they are smoke

we will not write a new one
there will not be a new one
another one, another one

where do all the secrets live
they travel in the air
you can smell them when they burn
they travel
those who say the past is not dead
stop and smell the smoke
you keep on saying the past is not dead
come on and smell the smoke
you keep saying the past is not dead
stop and smell the smoke
you keep saying the past is not even past
you keep saying
we are smoke



this is the one song on my list that really has expresses some bitterness. i don't know why, but this tune makes me think about a divorced couple more than any other kind of relationship. a love that has turned bitter and resentful after so long. and this is end of it, at least as much as there can be an end to that kind of disastrous affair. three of the songs on this list feature some incredible word picture; this is the first one: the idea of the relationship as a book, being ripped up and torn to shreds only to be burned and turned into smoke. so sad and so angry at the same time. one thing that gets me is that it feels like a love that's not only bitter, but a love that's regretted as well. this pair is trying to forget their life together. "all the things we've written in it never really happened, all of the people come and gone, never really lived." this is a guy that wants to leave behind everything that he had with his woman, wanting to forget everything and burn the book. i think the part that always brings to my mind the idea of a failed marriage is the second verse. these lines are the ones that really, really get to my heart. they're speaking of old memories, old scars that never fully healed, all the big and little things that contributed to the end of their love, and they're saying let's be done with them. the language here is so intimate; that's why it's so sad. "here's an evening dark with shame...here's the time i took the blame...here's the time we didn't speak it seemed for years and years. no one will ever know the reasons for the tears." these words kill me. to have something so intimate between two humans yet so painful. how tragic. i love the role that smoke plays in these lyrics; just brilliant. smoke is such a vague thing, you can't catch it, can't hold on to it. when you walk into a smoky room, you're immediately aware of it, yet with time your senses almost completely forget about it. but even as you seem to forget about it, it's still around you and you are always just so vaguely aware of it. what a sad way to think of lost love. love that's turned bitter, and wanting to be done with it but you never really can be because it's turned into smoke. you'll always have a bit of it with you. the music in this song is phenomenal too; it evokes such a perfect sentiment with the lyrics. first off, from a completely non-heart-related standpoint, i love the bass line in this song. ben folds always has such terrific bass lines in his songs; this tune is no exception. his piano is just great here too. just three simple chords, and they convey so much. it's weird, one minor and two major, yet still the major chords bring such a sad sound. and the drums have such a perfect sound in this tune. i hear so much of the brushes on these drums, the kind you hear in really smooth jazz pieces. they have such a fluid sound, almost a silky sound. when i hear these drums i always think of a jazz trio in a smoky bar. this kind of drum sound so strongly elicits the thought of smoke in my head, even when i hear it in other tunes, so it just fits flawlessly into this song. this tune offers so much. so so good.



#3: Brothers On A Hotel Bed - Death Cab For Cutie

you may tire of me
as our december sun is setting
cause i'm not who i used to be
no longer easy on the eyes
but these wrinkles masterfully disguise
the youthful boy below
who turned your way and saw
something he was not looking for
both a beginning and an end
but now he lives inside
someone he does not recognize
when he catches his reflection on accident.
on the back of a motorbike
with your arms outstretched trying to take flight
leaving everything behind
but even at our swiftest speed
we couldn't break from the concrete
in the city where we still reside
and i have learned
that even landlocked lovers yearn
for the sea like navy men
cause now we say goodnight
from our own separate sides
like brothers on a hotel bed,
like brothers on a hotel bed,
like brothers on a hotel bed,
like brothers on a hotel bed.
you may tire of me
as our december sun is setting
cause i'm not who i used to be



heartbreaker. starts out soft and slow, with just a gorgeous piano part introing the song, and so so quietly in the background what sounds like an out of tune jack in the box or circus toy. it's creepy, but it's so quiet you can't hardly hear it unless you turn the volume way up. then the chords in this song, oh my goodness. c#minor will always be one of the saddest chords for me, forever. all the chords and notes just fit so well, they're put together perfectly for the tune. such a haunting melody. and his words, absolutely gorgeous words. this song feels like so many different emotions. i've never heard such a heartbreaking analysis of old, stale love. such a sad thought, not even love lost, but love forgotten, or even worse, regretted. love that still exists in a way but is now resented, and yet without upfront bitterness. "the youthful boy...who turned your way and saw something he was not looking for, both a beginning and an end." what a line. a boy finds a girl whose love offers a beginning, a new life with her, and an end, the end of his own free life, the end of his dreams and hopes and his own personal desires. such a sad thought. change is such a sad thought in a relationship. it's inevitable, but it's so sad. "but now he lives inside someone he does not recognize when he catches his reflection on accident." it always seems like to me, when a relationship of a friend goes sour or in a movie or something, a line that is often spoken is "what happened to the man i married" or "you've changed", "you're not who you used to be", etc. change in relationships is such a sad concept to me. maybe because it never seems positive. it always seems to be accompanied with heartache and sorrow; the drifting apart of two people. it's like these two people know their love is almost completely gone, but they stay together because it's too late to do anything else. this song also makes me think of a married couple. a couple together for too long, and now have no other option but to stay together. and their love is full of regret. the line that gets me the most: "but even at our swiftest speed, we couldn't break from the concrete..." their love never really took off like they thought it would. it couldn't ever soar; such a sad thought. they gave it a go and they couldn't do it. that line paired with the hook just kills me. "now we say goodnight from our own separate sides, like brothers on a hotel bed." that is one of the most well-put word pictures i've ever heard in a song. there is so much distance between brothers sleeping on a hotel bed, and so much distance between these old lovers. it's so defeated. they tried, it didn't work, and now they can do nothing else but what they know. such great writing here.



#2: Slow Dancing In A Burning Room - John Mayer

It's not a silly little moment
it's not the storm before the calm
this is the deep and dying breath
of this love we've been working on
can't seem to hold you like i want to
so i can feel you in my arms
nobody's gonna come and save you
we pulled too many false alarms

we're going down
and you can see it too
we're going down
and you know that we're doomed
my dear we're
slow dancing in a burning room

i was the one you always dreamed of
you were the one i tried to draw
how dare you say it's nothing to me
baby you're the only light i ever saw
i'll make the most of all the sadness
you'll be a bitch because you can
you'll try to hit me just to hurt me
so you leave me feeling dirty
cause you can't understand

we're going down
and you can see it too
we're going down
and you know that we're doomed
my dear we're
slow dancing in a burning room

go cry about it why don't you
go cry about it why don't you
go cry about it why don't you
my dear we're
slow dancing in a burning room

don't you think we oughta know by now
don't you think we should've learned somehow



this is so close to the #1 spot it's ridiculous. there is almost too much and too little to say about this song. it hits every right note, musically and lyrically. that old c#minor is back, and it's used even better here than in #3. also, f#minor makes an appearance during the bridge, and it's such an appropriate place to stick another absolutely despondent chord. the chords in this song speak such volumes; every piece of this tune is just exquisitely put together. the progressions are so great, and the guitar playing only adds. the guitar in this song is so incredibly perfect. the tones john mayer uses here for the solo, for the rhythm guitar, for the hook, they just burrow their way into my heart and communicate their own personal ideas about this whole relationship. that's when you know the music is right; when the lyrics say something and the music says more. he uses such restraint in the guitar too; the solo is so short and so strong. it could've been minutes longer; instead it's kept short and sweet and powerful. love it. and the control used for the rhythm guitar... perfect. musically, this is a tune i listen to as the model of how i want to play one day. there is something so subtle about john mayer's playing here; it's just so right in every way. it's never over the top, he adds what he needs to add and holds back what he needs to hold back. this is rhythm guitar at it's finest. when you add the bass to what magic he's already done with the guitar, it blows this song through the roof. i don't know what it is about the bass in this song, but i've never heard anything more fitting. it's quiet, powerful, and so well-done. it's just the right mix of plucky and smooth. just once or twice, turn the chorus up and listen hard for the bass. incredibly beautiful. during the bridge too, absolutely sensational bass playing. i love when music sounds remarkable not because of the amount of notes or how fast it's being played, but because of the care and soul put into each note and how well it all flows. i gotta say something about the vocal layering here too; #5 featured some great stuff but this is the real deal. everything great about the vocal layering in #5 is just cranked to 11 here, it is so incredibly well-done. listen to the chorus again, and listen only to the background. so subtle. i can't explain it, but the layering here just sounds so enchanting. during the chorus and bridge especially, the background vocals add such emotion to this tune. extraordinary. and then his words. this is one of the most romantic and beautiful songs i've ever heard, even though it is about such melancholy. the main idea of the song, two lovers who know their love is ending and giving it their final bow, absolutely breaks my heart. a relationship is ending and almost by no fault of either lover. it's such beautiful imagery, two lovers saying goodbye amidst chaos and disarray. the way john mayer puts his words together here just stuns me. this song too has such an intimate feel, yet for some reason i don't think of married lovers, i just think of a couple that has been together for awhile, gave it a real try, maybe even harder than most do, and it's still coming down around them. the second verse is one of the most beautiful verses in music i've ever heard. "i was the one you always dreamed of, you were the one i tried to draw..." it's as though they both idealized the other so much, thinking it would be The Relationship, the one everyone searches for, and then the next line reveals some of their pain. "how dare you say it's nothing to me, baby you're the only light i ever saw." the intimacy of these words is perfect though, especially when he uses bitch. it's the most un-derogatory use of this word i've ever heard. it's almost sweet, if the word can be that. it's sweet to me in that there is an intimacy to it; he knows her well enough to know how she'll treat him as their dance ends and as what's left of their love turns to anger or bitterness. it is a painful intimacy, yet it's an intimacy nonetheless. it's a painfully beautiful way to use such an ugly word. but as far as imagery goes, i will always come back to this tune for it's hook. "slow dancing in a burning room". such a tragic picture of love ending. and so much more so because he prefaces it with "my dear" in the chorus. the loving language used in this song makes me think that there are so many "what ifs" or "if onlys" in this relationship. what if he had done this more often, if only she hadn't torn him down, what if she had loved in a different way, if only he hadn't said that thing that hurt her so much. the "what ifs" and "if onlys" really get me. there is still love here, but it's dying, and this is their final goodbye, their last dance before it all ends. breaks my heart. such a perfect song.



#1: I Just Don't Think I'll Ever Get Over You - Colin Hay

i drink good coffee every morning
comes from a place that's far away
and when i'm done i feel like talking
without you here, there is less to say

i don't want you thinking i'm unhappy
but what is closer to the truth
that if i lived 'til i was one hundred and two
i just don't think i'll ever get over you

no longer moved to drink strong whiskey
i shook the hand of time and i knew
that if i live 'til i could no longer climb my stairs
i just don't think i'll ever get over you

your face, it dances and it haunts me
your laughter still ringing in my ears
i still find pieces of your presence here
even, even after all these years

and i don't want you thinking that i don't get asked to dinner
cause i'm here to say that i sometimes do
even though i may soon feel the touch of love
i just don't think i'll ever get over you

and if i lived until i was one hundred and two
i just don't think i'll ever get over you



this is my favorite break-up song ever. first of all, a gorgeous acoustic guitar part played throughout the whole tune. quiet, nothing over the top. fits the sentiment perfectly. this is such a soft-spoken song; the lyrics aren't forceful, they're just the truth told in a tranquil way. the music is the exact same way. i love the complement between the music and lyrics here. they are both so similar; calm, slow, communicating so much emotion and so much love. in reality, i think this is more of a love song than a break-up song. i think because the kind of love it speaks of. it's a chin-up kind of love, a down-and-out but not giving up kind of love. this is love that's held on to. he doesn't have her anymore but he's still holding on to her love. so beautiful. two noteworthy lyrical parts to this song. one is this line: "without you here, there is less to say." there is no way to better articulate that idea. it's the perfect description of the perfect relationship. but it's so sad because she's gone, and he doesn't have this perfect relationship anymore. it's only enhanced because he did have her at one point, and now all he can think of is what he's lost. this could be as much about a lover that has passed away as a lover that's left him. there is no trace of bitterness here, no sign of an emotional struggle between two people. just a part of this guy's life is gone. he can't fill it anymore because it was made to fit this one woman, and she's not with him. so sad. the fourth verse is really the killer though. the whole thing is beautiful, but this line: "i still find pieces of your presence here". wow. goosebumps every time i hear him sing it. i think this song hits me in a deep place because the closest i've been to this is a long distance relationship(which isn't even close to this kind of sorrow), but that still is so emotionally draining in this way. how much more so is a relationship like this? love that's left but he's still clinging onto it. he can't let go of it. but the idea of being years past this lover and still finding pieces of her after so long. such a gorgeous idea. she's gone in person, but the idea of her, her presence, still lives with him, still haunts him. this is a lost love that was perfect in every way. there is no sadder idea to me than knowing something this intimately, this closely, knowing that it fits us perfectly, and yet not being able to keep it. losing something that completes us. there is beautiful sadness and beautiful love mixing in these words. all he wants is to have her back. he had what everyone searches for, and now he doesn't. such sorrow, such despondency. and he's still holding on to her through all of it. that is why this is my #1 song.

i'm feeling pretty basic today. Top 5 Side Ones, Track Ones.

well a month came and went. luckily for me it was the shortest month i could've chosen, making this whole play count experiment a bit easier. so last night i plugged my ipod in to make sure my itunes would be as up to date as possible, and then i remade my Top 100 Most Played playlist. and how about this. i was actually disappointed with what i saw. my current Top 10 Most Played:

1. Baby Be Mine - Michael Jackson
2. P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing) - Michael Jackson
3. Flashing Lights - Kanye West Feat. Dwele
4. Slow Dancing In A Burning Room - John Mayer
5. Good Life - Kanye West Feat. T-Pain
6. Lesson Learned - Alicia Keys Feat. John Mayer
7. I Don't Trust Myself (With Loving You) - John Mayer
8. I Wonder - Kanye West
9. Champion - Kanye West
10. Digital Love - Daft Punk

my Top 10 has shuffled a tiny bit, but just barely. and there weren't even that many new additions to the total Top 100. without a doubt, the reason for this is that once i deleted my most played playlist at the beginning of the month, i was forced to go back to listening to full albums rather than just a bunch of random songs with the highest play counts. needless to say, as disappointed as i was to see no dramatic change in my Top 100, the last month has led to listening to loads of great music.

album #1: i started off with "as i am" by alicia keys. i got this album from a buddy months ago, and really had only listened to the whole album once, and "lesson learned", her collab with john mayer, like seventy times. so listening to the whole thing afresh was fantastic. to be honest, i didn't fall in love with every single song, but oh man tracks 4-10 are off the wall good. "i need you" has one of coolest drum beats in a r&b song, and "wreckless love" is basically just alicia killin' it. man that woman has some pipes. and listening to "lesson learned" within the context of the rest of the album was great too; that song is absolutely phenom. oddly enough though, even though i felt like i listened to the album a billion times, the only song that cracked the Top 100 was wreckless love. oh well. my fav track, "lesson learned":



album #2: d'angelo's "brown sugar." while admittedly not as flawless/classic/unforgettable/impeccable/indelible as "voodoo", this is a killer first album from the king of neo-soul. i really like this album because i can hear vintage sounds left and right, but still the whole feel is completely mid 90s. it's weird, normally i would like the opposite of that, an album recently released with traces of modern pop/r&b/whatever but overall sounding more like vintage soul or just vintage music in general. but in this case it's so great. i don't want to disparage this album in any way, but it's so much easier to listen to than "voodoo". "voodoo" takes months to sink in, no joke. it took like two years to find it's way into my Top 5 lists. but "brown sugar" is just a lot more accessible, almost... easy. which is to say nothing bad, it's just different than "voodoo". but it's a great one. here's my fav. track, "lady":



album #3: this was more a playlist than one album. i threw all three of jack johnson's albums into my "spain sizzler" playlist and shuffled it for like a week and a half straight. i'd say "brushfire fairytales" got the least playment, "on and on" (even though it is my favorite of the three, thumbs up to adam.) came in second, and "in between dreams" was most played. i think just because when it came out, i was living in the dorms at iowa with the frattiest of frat guys for a roommate, and "banana pancakes" became the ultimate douchebag anthem and i really didn't have any desire to really dig into the rest of the album. i'm glad i did now though; picking through the dece songs on this album leads to some fantastic tunes. i've already posted my new fav. off this album, but the other noteworthy track was "belle":



i listened to this on top of the eiffel tower. holler.

these were the three albums that got the most playment during the last month, but here are the others that got played through at least once.

waltz for debby - bill evans trio: one of best jazz albums ever made. recorded live, this thing is chock full of gorgeous jazz piano trio music. don't even know what to say about it. makes me want to never quit playing the piano.

heavier things - john mayer: i'm never gonna stop listening to this album. one of the best sophomore releases ever. that would make a great Top 5 list.

thriller - michael jackson: no explanation required.

100 days, 100 nights - sharon jones & the dap-kings: another outstanding album by the most overlooked soul singer around today. sharon jones should've been as famous as aretha or tina or diana, but she wasn't and i'm glad because she probably wouldn't have found the dap-kings. partly responsible for the absolutely rich sounds of amy winehouse's killer album "back to black", the dap-kings know what real soul music is and how far our current generation has gotten from true artistic soul. with that in mind, they've gotten together with sharon jones and have released three albums of pure, unadulterated soul. so great. here's just a taste of their goodness, "tell me":



subtitulo - josh rouse: another album i need to keep coming back to. i listened to it this month about three times, and it's only because i'm being distracted by other great music that i'm not deep into this one. josh rouse has got a knack for great acoustic band pop that isn't easily brushed aside. this album needs more listens from me before i really write about it.

corinne bailey rae - corinne bailey rae: this englishwoman has nailed acoustic soul. she's either an english alicia keys with a guitar or an english female john legend with a guitar. or a fusion of the two. or something completely different. whatever it is, she's great.

it won't be soon before long - maroon 5: only the fast songs. i don't know what it is, but when these guys write a ballad, it's just terrible. maybe it's adam levine's awful whiney voice. it only really works in the fast songs. but oh man i love those fast songs. great hooks, great guitar parts, just fun fun songs. otherwise no thanks.

homework - daft punk: daft punk is getting their own entire post from me sometime so i'm not gonna write to much here. i'll just say i'm discovering new things about this one.

electric ladyland - jimi hendrix experience: obviously a classic, just one i'm not well acquainted with. i only went through it once; it is an incredibly dense album (total running time 1:15:21). not one to listen to as i'm hurrying to class. this is one to sit down and digest. this is a record that deserves a dark room, a huge leather chair, and a listen-to on vinyl. i hope it happens one day.

so that's about it. going back and looking at all the music i listened to, i actually feel a lot better about this whole experiment. i think what i'm gonna do is delete my Top 100 playlist again and come back to it next month. i feel like i've connected to all this music so much better like this. i almost want to apologize or something for spending so much time with just a collection of my most played songs in the place of real albums. there is something so untouchable about an album, something so inherently special. i love that i'm listening to a collection of thoughts and opinions and feelings that an artist compiled in an exact and specific way for me. i feel like way too many people take that away from the artist by downloading singles from itunes or just having a crappy incomplete selection of tunes from artists. i enjoy finding my own specific favorite tracks within an album, but it's the best when i've found them within the context of the whole album. i don't feel like i'm taking away from the artist or the album in any way. albums require time and energy and work, and that's why i love them so much. so from here on out, i will spend far less time listening to mixes of my favorite songs and focus more on albums. my library is rife with albums i haven't digested yet. i've got a lot of work ahead of me. i wonder if doctors can listen to music while they're working.

-jon

Paris, Sunday: Day 3

we woke up on sunday really early in order to get to the airport in time for our 9:50 flight. we were both ridiculously tired, but with blake being a little sick, i think it was harder on him. we got checked in and slept a bit until our plane was ready to go and then slept on the plane until we got to bilbao. once we got to bilbao, we hopped on a bus and headed over to the guggenheim. we grabbed a bit of food from a kiosk and ate in front of puppy PICTURE. it is a pretty cool looking thing. those are all real flowers.

the guggenheim museum itself is a really cool building. just totally weird design, totally stands out from all the antique looking architecture around spain. we went inside and paid; it was cheaper than the louvre (obviously) and an audio guide came included in the price, sweet. pictures are prohibited inside the museum though, so that was kind of a bummer slash a good thing. the guggenheim houses some of the most out of this world surrealist art. pictures would've been almost dumb to try and take. we saw lots of cool stuff in there, the problem is that we saw a lot more stuff that didn't make any sense. surrealism is just so pointless to me. i like the interpretation aspect of art, but if it's just so off the wall that you can't make out a theme or something in the piece, it's pointless. i don't even know what else to say about it. i enjoy seeing art and being pleased by its aesthetic qualities; i don't enjoy looking at something and not knowing what is going on or not being able to see anything beautiful in it. i guess i just don't get it.

so in a nutshell, that was the guggenheim. worth the 7 euros, just a weird place. and then we missed our bus and had to wait in bilbao seven extra hours. real cool alsa bus company.

and that was our weekend. overall it was good. paris is an absolutely gorgeous city and i would love to return one day. especially after learning french. or at least after watching beauty and the beast again.

-jon

Paris, Saturday: Day 2

this day started off far better than friday. we woke up, showered, then headed on over to the train station to pick up rémy. we got a little nervous though because we couldn't find him anywhere in the station and we had no way of calling him from our terrible phones (which only get signal in spain apparently), so we just wandered around the station until we found some pay phones. we gave him a quick call; his train hadn't even arrived yet. i got a pastry from little bakery in the station, not that good, and then rémy arrived.

rémy was born in france and as far as i know lived there until high school, when he spent three years at cedar falls high in cedar falls, iowa. that's how blake and he knew each other. that's also how he was able to learn english. and he speaks it perfectly. he's got a bit of a french accent, but he knew the nuances of the language, he knew idioms and colloquialisms of english, it was great. he was completely fluent. and i've never really hung out with anybody bilingual, or i guess never really seen them interact in society. all my spanish teachers in the states were bilingual obviously, but i only ever saw them interact with a bunch of students who couldn't speak spanish very well, so i never got to see how bilingualism worked. and it was awesome with rémy. the first place we went to was a little bakery to buy some french bread, and we talked about what we wanted and then he went up and ordered it. perfect french. so cool. i immediately wanted to become as fluent in spanish. i'd be happy with any language but spanish is probably my best bet. it was just so interesting to see him be able to go from a conversation with us in english to speaking perfect french, back to speaking english with us. just a very cool thing to experience. the whole day he was switching between languages; it was so fascinating to me that his brain could do it so efficiently. for me with spanish, i do my best to think in spanish as much as i can, but in class or in nerve wracking spanish situations i find myself thinking in english and translating it. i can't imagine what it's like to be totally fluent in two different languages, be able to just spit out whatever you want to say in either without thinking. what a great thing.

after we got some bread, he wanted to stop in at his sister's place to say hi. she's about 25 i think, and she has a small flat about a twenty minute walk to the eiffel tower. it was kind of weird though, she doesn't speak any english, so we got there and met her... and then what is there to say? we didn't know how to say nice to meet you or anything so blake and i kind of just sat there while the french people spoke in french. after we left, rémy took us to one of his favorite restaurant/bars close by. we had a couple beers (which, by the way, were actually really good. i've never heard of this before but they put like syrupish flavoring in them. we had a peach beer and a raspberry beer. so much better than regular old beer.) and headed on to the tower.

what is there to say about the eiffel tower. it's impressive, especially as you're walking up to it, and it gets bigger and bigger the closer you get. it's a really beautiful piece of architecture, but it's weird to me. it's a gigantic metal skeleton, and it's the most visited paid monument in the world. people everywhere think it's absolutely gorgeous, yet it's so inorganic. just a bunch of a metal beams melded together to make a huge pointy tower. it's just interesting to me that a couple of i-beams have been put together in such a way that it's one of the most recognizable structures and one of the biggest tourist attractions in the entire world.

we walked until we were underneath the tower, and there were super long lines to go up. rémy said if we came back at night the lines would be way shorter so we took some pictures in front of tower (mandatory) and headed off for somewhere new. we walked along the seine river for awhile until we got to a metro station. we ran into rémy's sister again, who stuck with us for the remainder of the afternoon. we rode the metro a bit, then headed back up into the daylight, and as soon as we walked out of the metro exit, this is what we saw: so great. how parisian is that? these guys were all just off the wall good, it was so cool. then we headed into this little neighborhood that was classic paris. we had finally found the paris i was expecting the whole trip. it was gorgeous, little shops everywhere, really pretty architecture along the buildings, tons of bohemian looking people. and then we came to the sacré-cœur basilica on top of montmartre, the highest hill in the city. first of all, this whole area was gorgeous. there were lots of people everywhere, and the hill has a gorgeous view of the city. and the basilica, my goodness. how magnificent. it's just such a grand building, there is not too much to say about it. at this point, rémy told us to watch our stuff, as there are tons of tourists about and as a result, tons of pickpockets. luckily, neither of us got anything "lifted". we were however approached by a crowd of black guys at the very bottom of the walking path up to the summit of montmartre. it wasn't a whole group that approached us all at once, there were just tons of guys roaming around looking for helpless tourists. this one guy came up to me and said something in french so i tried out "i don't speak french" in french, totally butchered it, and he started laughing at me. so he started talking to me in english. what they would try to do is get your attention and then get your hand and tie a little string around your pinky finger, and then talk to you while they made this little colored thread bracelet for you. and then ask you to pay for it. as far as i could tell there was no funny business involved, but i really didn't want to talk to this guy so i kept trying to avoid him and finally he was like "hey man, hakuna matata, i respect you, you respect me. i only want 1 minute, if you don't want what i make you don't have to have it." decent argument, i have no idea what to say to that. so i reluctantly give this guy my pinky and let him do his schtick. he asks me where we're from, if i have a girlfriend, all that stuff. and he makes me a cool bracelet. and then asks me to pay for it. and i said no. and that was that. i was overly aware of my wallet in my front pocket the whole time though; some silly african with some thread wasn't gonna get anything off of me. but he was nice and really funny. and he said hakuna matata to me, a real african said hakuna matata! how great is that.

so we continued our walk up montmartre until we got to the summit. such a gorgeous view. this city is huge. you could see forever, just city. then we walked into the basilica. it was breathtaking. pictures weren't allowed, and i'm almost glad because it would've been ridiculous to even try to capture how spectacular the inside of this place is. it is so huge; there is a gigantic area that looks like a sanctuary with a lot of pews and then surrounding that there are so many little alcoves with statues of saints and things like that. it's just one colossal room with so much to look at. so impressive.

we came out of the basilica and headed into what i thought was the most "paris" part of town that we got to see. it was just this little neighborhood with tons of people, tons of little shops of souvenirs and whatnot, and then we walked into this big square that was filled with artists painting. this is actually a famous square; it's been a haven for artists for decades. super cool though, you can just go and buy french artwork or get your caricature painted or whatever you want. very hip, very bohemian. we needed to get some food though and rémy knew of this sweet little restaurant further on so we kept walking. the place he took us to was SO cool. it was this really small restaurant that specialized in crêpes. the walls of this place were completely covered in notes, pictures, flyers, whatever. you can just put up whatever you wanted on the wall. there were dollar bills, notes to lovers, "jenny was here" type notes, all sorts of stuff. it was way cool. but the best part! there was this old guy banging on a piano right behind where blake and i were sitting. and holy cow he was good. he just played all sorts of jazzy fun music while we ate. it was so cool though, he was so good, he wasn't even paying attention to what he was playing. look at this: he's reading the newspaper! seriously he would turn pages in between songs and keep reading. wasn’t even looking at his hands. unbelievable. so we got some crêpes and some cider, which was all wicked expensive but when in rome, you know? the crêpes were good, not mind-blowing. they're like quesadillas with different stuff inside. we got ours with ham and cheese. nothing incredible, but still good.

we left to go visit the art square again, and i got a delicious crêpe filled with nutella from a small little vendor. holy cow that thing was delicious. and then we walked through the square, admiring all the artists and all the other tourists. it was a very cool place. i would've loved to buy some artwork but it was all really expensive, at least all the stuff worth getting. so we walked on. our next destination was the famous moulin rouge nightclub. we made it to pigalle, the famous red-light district of paris, and saw the club. it's a cool looking building. but as we walked down pigalle, my goodness. it was probably like two miles or so of just sex shops. but it's weird cause it's not like a seedy looking area. there were tons of regular looking tourists and french people out, and the architecture was nice and everything. i didn't see any hookers or cross dressers roaming the street. but the shops, yikes. a pretty risque part of town.

here we caught the metro and said goodbye to rémy’s sister. it was really pleasant spending the afternoon with her, even though we couldn’t really communicate with her at all. it was really sweet to she and rémy interact though, they seemed like really good friends. made me miss my sisters a lot. ruthie/hannah/rebekah, if any of you want to move to paris and let me come visit you, i’m all for it.

we hit the metro again and got to the island that holds the notre dame cathedral to wait for rémy's friend who was going to meet us around there. as we waited along the seine, something great happened. i glanced at one of the bridges and saw this: at first i was like "hm interesting" BUT it weirdly reminded me of something i couldn't place for a second, and then it hit me. the cedar river. yes. growing up in cedar rapids, one of our few claims to fame is that cedar rapids is one of only two mainland cities in the world that has it's governmental buildings on an island in the middle of the city. the other city: paris. and guess what i was looking at. the island. needless to say, i flipped out. here is my best shot at a panoramic view of the island.
so freakin' cool that i saw that.

i would've loved to visit the notre dame cathedral, but we had to go meet rémy's friend, xavier. i actually have no idea how to spell this guy's name, it was so hard to say. pronounced like "ksa-vee-ay." it took me all evening to learn how to say it correctly. so i'm just gonna spell it xavier. so we met up with him, went to a bar close by and watched the end of some french football game, and then headed to SUBWAY for dinner. holler. my meatball marinara never tasted so great. after subway we headed back towards the same bar we had stopped at earlier in the day, had a few flavored beers, and headed off to see the tower once more. i really wanted to go up during nighttime, so the guys obliged and we walked back towards the tower. on the way the guys wanted to stop at a small convenient store and buy some cheap wine, so we did that and then made it to the tower.

the tower at night is so beautiful. even so, it turns out most of the french are pretty disenchanted with the tower, and rémy and xavier didn't want to go up so they elected to stay on the champ de mars (the long lawn in front of the tower) while blake and i headed up. the two of us got in line, bought our tickets, and then got on the elevator. we bought tickets for the third floor, but they make you switch elevators on the second floor, and the line for the third floor was heinously long so we decided to just stay on the second and see what we could see. and it was gorgeous. the city really is just terrifically big, and there were lights everywhere. this is as good as i got. there's not really too much to say about being up in the tower. it's just really really pretty. and it would've been better with a girl. there are certain times or situations in life that are very suited towards a certain gender; going up the eiffel tower is suited towards being with a female companion. but blake and i enjoyed it. and then we got cold, so we bolted down the stairs. that was fun.

we got back out onto the champ de mars and the frenchmen had already finished off the first bottle of wine, so we cracked another bottle open and hung out and shared it. that is a special memory for me; drinking wine on the champ de mars in front of the eiffel tower with two frenchmen. great fun. after we finished the wine, xavier wanted to take us to his favorite bar in paris, so we headed off again to find the metro and ended up at this cool scottish looking pub. xavier goes to school in paris and i guess this is a really popular bar among international students. it was a pretty cool place though. xavier bought everybody a big beer, of which i drank none if i remember right. regular beer is just too gross for me. but the other guys drank theirs and helped me out with mine too, so add that to the wine we had at the tower and by the end of our time at the bar i was the only one still totally with it. rémy said he was too tired to do anything else, and blake and i had to catch a early morning flight so we decided to go back to our hostel.

i'm pretty proud of myself here. the whole day we took the metro a bunch of times to go all over the place, and it seemed so confusing to me. there is such a intricate network of underground tunnels all over paris, and since i can't read french, all the signs mean nothing to me. but i gotta give props to drunk xavier, he explained to me perfectly how we were supposed to get home on the metro. i was still a bit nervous, but he reassured me we would be fine. so we rode with rémy and xavier until our stop, and they stayed on, and we said goodbye, and then blake and i went to find our next metro stop underground. i'm telling you, it's a great transit system, but for a first-timer, it's really daunting. arrogance time: i nailed it. we got off at our stop and headed upwards toward the street, and literally came up exactly outside our hostel. i was psyched about it. so if i ever have to go back to paris, i'll be fine.

we got into our hostel and ran into a bit of a problem. for some reason, they told us when we checked in on friday that we would be switching rooms between friday and saturday night. so we got there saturday night, and the guy told us our room number was 6 and our roommate was already in there with the key. great. now we probably have to wake this stranger up and say hi we're your roommates for the night. uncomfortable. well we got to our room and the door was cracked; there were five beds, a double bunk bed and a triple bunk bed, and there was a girl already asleep on the bottom bed of the triple. great. just an uncomfortable situation, the door cracked, a girl asleep, and two strange dudes coming in and getting ready to go to bed. thank goodness she didn't wake up right then. so i'm getting ready for bed and our fourth roommate walks in. blake is asleep at this point so i talk to this guy for a bit. he was from new york, kind of a weird guy with an accent. he asked if either of us were musicians and if i wanted to be in a band with him. he was in paris looking for some other people to start a band with. i said no. while we were talking, the girl woke up and went to the sink to get a drink or something, and we were like we better stop whispering and go to sleep and she turned around and said no big deal. but guess what her shirt said. drake. what?! i was like "whoa, is that drake university, like in iowa?" and she said yeah and i said we were from uni and she flipped out too. she told me she was studying in florence or somewhere like that and she was visiting paris for the weekend. i can't believe we would run into somebody from another small school in a small state in the same hostel room in paris. small world i guess. so i said "go bulldogs" and went to sleep. i'm unsure of what you're supposed to say, do you say goodnight? normally goodnight is reserved for people you're familiar with isn't it? i don't know. i chose go bulldogs.

and that was day 2. far better than day 1. we saw so much more, and especially the beautiful parts of paris i was hoping to see. paris really delivered. i don't know if i would say i "fell in love" with paris, but it is now way more attractive to me. i really hope to go back someday and see the things i missed out on. on to day 3.

-jon