The Voice Recap: SPOILER ALERT

Disclaimer: All thoughts, statements and proclamations contained within are the sole opinion of the writer. And they are opinions only. And I disagree with lots of people and most news articles I've read about the show so be forewarned... I despise Dia.

The Voice ended it's first season run last night and I certainly have some conflicting emotions. Ultimately, the show was a success for me because despite its many flaws, I kept coming back for each new episode because I was invested. I must say, I am very pleased with the winner. Javier obviously had the best technical voice of the whole crew, and while it might not have been the most unique voice, nobody deserved the title more than him. But let me back up a bit.

I've been unsure during the whole run of the show whether or not it seems like an effective structure. The whole coach votes and audience votes seemed confusing and ineffective, and especially since the voting system changed every week. It was hard to keep up with how things were actually getting tallied. And since each coach became emotionally invested in their particular team, they seemed to get less and less helpful as the show went on and offered less criticism. By the end, not a single coach said anything negative about any performance, other than "Didn't like the setting." Far too complimentary for a group of amateurish singers who all faced serious missteps in any given performance. I stopped caring what the coaches were going to say because they all basically said the same thing, "You have a fantastic voice, you're such a star, such great presence, I'm a fan of you!" Watered-down mumbo-jumbo if you ask me.

Which begs the question, how important is a contestant's actual vocal ability in this show? How soon does it become more about presence and spectacle than talent? Biggest case of this is with Team Cee Lo's final two members, Vicci vs. Nakia. Nakia's final performance was Whataya Want From Me (that's actually how the song title is spelled, and it makes me sick.) Nakia did a fine job with the tune, but forget it as soon as Vicci comes out and does a (vocally) average rendition of Dog Days Are Over, but who had an entire fleet of Japanese Taiko drummers to back up her own fiery drumming. Who sang better? Nakia. Who performed better? Vicci. Vicci wins. Of course you're going to win if you're the last performer and you have a grand show-stopping tune to cap off the night. So is it fair? Who the heck knows.

This also leads me to believe that the coaches stopped doing anything worthwhile except for choosing songs to sing. With one glaring exception (DIA), the finalists all had great voices. And they all faltered on certain songs because of poor song choice. But did the coaches EVER give them any real vocal critique past the semifinals? Of course not. When really, what could've been said were things like this:

"Javier, the original song you sang actually seemed a bit off for you. You didn't seem comfortable, you sounded out of breath the whole time, and your voice didn't ever seem to find its power through the song. Nerves maybe?"

"Vicci, rather than turning every song into a contest with yourself to see how much air you can push out of your mouth by hitting as high of a note as you can, try scaling back a little and showing some variety in your voice."

"Beverly, stop falling back on hitting that one wavery high note you hit in every single song when you're not sure where to go with a vocal run."

"Dia, you're awful in general. Go back to the anime cartoon you came from."

The last one is a little harsh, but you get the idea. Nobody was flawless all the way through, but the show just got so freakin' feel-good by the end.

In terms of the four finalists, I wasn't totally on board with all of them. My ideal final four would've been Xenia, Bev/Frenchie (didn't care, liked them both), Nakia, and Javier. There was no way Xenia was going to make it to the final four, and I'm surprised she even made it as far as she did. The girl had the voice most noticeably different than everyone else on the show, but gosh did she lack some stage presence. Her performance of Price Tag was clearly uncomfortable to watch, even if her voice was fun to hear. Nakia just had more flair for me than Vicci. Vicci has a decent voice, but I wasn't buying into her whole war-dance/primal scream persona. Who could seriously listen to an entire album of her taxing her lungs that way? It'd be exhausting. And Casey Weston's weak Dolly Parton impression was absolutely no match for Javier's range and technical skill.

And then there's Dia. Where do I begin? From the very beginning, she has played this show like a game. Granted, it is a reality show vocal contest game, but the fact that she is playing it so obviously makes me hate her. She is without a doubt the most disingenuous person on the show. Looking back, she started out harmless, singing some breezy song with her innocuous voice that got Cee Lo and Blake to turn their chairs. Whatever, not a big deal. She came across as this super shy girl with an interesting voice, but oh if only she could break out of her shell! said everyone. Fast forward to the battle round, still a bit stronger, but boy Dia you really need to break out of your shell if you're going to get further! And everytime she's on camera up to this point, she's blinking her little mousey eyelashes at everyone and giving off this "Are these big celebrities telling little ol' me that I have a good voice? It couldn't be!" vibe. Then comes her performance of an acousticey Heartless, which sorry, has already been done by another reality show singing competition. Go get a more original cover, Dia. But oh my gosh! Dia finally came out of her shell! Nobody saw that one coming! Where did this little on-stage firecracker come from?! And then in the coaches remarks, she's back to blinking at them like she didn't know what just happened and she's just so thankful for all their kind words, blah blah blah. Awful. This girl knew exactly what she was doing the entire show, and she apparently fooled Blake and all of voting America with her snake-like behaviors. So from then on, she just kept the strong performances coming, and not strong vocally, just strong in that everybody thinks she's doing so well by singing confidently when really she's had that in her the whole time. She played it so well, she started with a problem that was very easy to fix, no confidence/no stage presence, and when she did fix it, America freaked out and started buying her crappy Kanye cover on iTunes. Annoyed me to no end. How could you have released FOUR albums without any confidence in your vocal ability? Does not add up. If you look at her and you look at Xenia, obviously Xenia was being real because she actually did look uncomfortable and was not good on stage. She's sixteen! She wasn't faking anything. Dia was faking all the way.

And here's the worst part: her voice is not that great. Sure, she can carry a melody just fine, but her voice sounded basically like this to me. I can't really explain it much better than blaaaah-blaaaah, blaaah-blaaaah. Like she pushed her tongue out all the time and the sounds came from the back of her throat. Just awful to listen to.

Ironically, the only person that seemed to ever point out that she was playing the game well and putting up a front was the show's fakest asset, coach Christina. There were actually two or three times where Christina's comments were less than flattering and came just short of calling her out on her game-playing and Dia's little cat-like demeanor changed from this:

to this:

Kudos, Christina.

Here's the most frustrating part about Dia for me too, she nailed her duet with Blake. They chose the best possible song, it sounded great, Blake's country voice fit just perfectly into that Tom Petty song. If she had made her Voice debut with that song and not played her manipulative game, I would've liked her far more. I'm so glad she didn't win.

So overall, did the show succeed? Did it find The Voice? I'm saying definitely. Javier has a great voice, and deserves the accolades he's receiving. Should it be up to America to choose The Voice? Definitely not, as based on the finalists original song performance, Javier just barely beat out Dia. Neither of their originals were that great. Javier had a good song, he just did not deliver a good performance. Based strictly on original performance, you know who I thought was going to win? Beverly all the way. Yeah her original song was a little cheesy bland vanilla ("lovesick...lovesick...I'm sick of love!"), but gosh did she deliver a great performance, and not only spectacle and stage presence, but she nailed her vocal part. She had the best original performance without a doubt. Yet Javier still wins. Did America choose right? Yes, but I wouldn't trust them to do it again.

One last thing before I wrap; the show needs to ease off the product placement. Yes I know the finale needs to be exactly that, a finale, with grandiosity and flourish and big names, but I don't consider Pitbull and Ne-Yo to be big names. Stevie Nicks was a good draw with some legit credibility (even if she has the most nasal voice ever), but the Train singer? Even worse, the OneRepublic singer? American Idol alum Katherine McPhee? Do we need a Social Media Correspondent? Or a "chance" run in with Gym Class Heroes in the next door studio which allows Adam to perform their upcoming hit single on which he is featured? All this stuff seemed SO contrived and I'd love to see less of it and more actually performing by the contestants (and the coaches for that matter). And now a few favorites:

Favorite Voice: Probably Xenia. While she wasn't technically the best, nor certainly not the best on stage, she had a super unique tone for a 16 year old and was really fun to listen to.

Favorite Performance by a Contestant or Coach: Team Cee Lo's cover of Everyday People by Sly & The Family Stone. Cee Lo's afro wig was unforgettable.

Top 3 Season 1 Moments:

3. What song does Christina choose to duet with her protege? HER OWN SONG. This was the icing on the cake for how inflated her ego could actually get.

2. Brad Paisley asking Blake a question mid-song and Blake responding in kind by singing while sitting down then getting up and joining Brad on stage. So cheesy.

1. "If The Voice should be delayed for anyone, it should be...for the President. LET'S, GET, TOIT!" - Carson Daly, possibly the blandest and cheesiest human being alive. Can't wait for what gems he's got in store for us during Season 2.

-Jon

P.S. Was Cee Lo and Vicci's Pat Benetar cover inspired by Hook? Cee Lo made a great Rufio.

Reception Dances

What makes a good wedding reception dance? Not the reception itself, but specifically the dance. I have attended two weddings this season, and only have one more before the summer is over, but it's been something that I've thought about at every wedding I've ever been to (that had a dance) and I want to try and dissect what exactly makes or breaks a reception dance.

I see a few very fundamental factors that need to be considered: audience, atmosphere, and the music itself. Let's take a look at each.

1. Audience

This is where you need to start because these are the people who are going to be doing the actual dancing. If you are not putting out material that pleases them, you'll lose them and subsequently, you'll lose the dance. So you've got to read the room a little, see what age brackets are really represented, and even more importantly, what age brackets will get up and do the most dancing. This is a tough one because while weddings can skew younger or older, you're guaranteed to have at least somewhat of a variety of people to satisfy. And you won't be able to satisfy them all. Tough stuff. Also, you've got to read what sort of music your crowd will groove on. Is it a country crowd? Is it an old swing crowd? A very religious crowd? All this needs to be taken into account when choosing songs. More on that soon.

2. Atmosphere

What kind of wedding is it? Religious, younger, older, traditional, alcohol, modern, big, small, dance floor, or a mix of some or all? All of these types and some extra ones will certainly affect how the dance goes. As I think about it, it's kind of hard to actually qualify how exactly each of these components fits into making a great dance. In the most general sense, I would say the best fit for a killer dance is going to be young, mildly-liberally religious, big, and I'm going out on a limb for this one, no alcohol. Call me crazy, but all too often alcohol takes away from the good-natured vibe of a great dance. It makes non-drinkers uncomfortable, and there is nothing worse (for me) than dancing around/with people who have drunk themselves into the sleepy-eyed phase. I've only once seen alcohol at a wedding done with class and taste and it contributed to the overall party feeling of the dance.

Another important aspect that falls under this category is the DJ. Is it a professional wedding DJ or a friend of the bride or groom? For a couple that wants their dance to go a specific way, this is a very important thing to take into account. There is no right answer here, and there are many pros and cons to each. Quick list:

Pro DJ Pros:

1. Equipment - Any pro DJ worth their cost will provide an excellent sound system that should not give you any problems during the dance. No feedback, killer song transitions, etc.

2. Pacing - Almost every pro DJ I've ever seen keeps the whole reception moving so much better than friend DJs. Not to say it can't be done by friend DJs, but for the most part, pro DJs seem to have a better sense of how to keep things from getting awkward. Announcing the bridal party, announcing what's coming next (cake cutting, first dances, garter/bouquet toss, etc.)

3. Song selection - Any pro DJ worth their cost will have an extensive song collection that will include an array of genres, years, artists, etc. Any guest can make a request and it will almost certainly be available to play (unless it's on the bride/groom's don't-play list).

4. Groovin' - This relates to the pacing point but more specifically to the dance itself. Almost unequivocally, a pro DJ will have more experience than a friend DJ in terms of what songs will keep people interested and on the floor. Most friend DJs (with few exceptions) don't know what to play next to keep the floor busy and that's a detriment to the flow of the dance.

Pro DJ Cons:

1. Price - ALWAYS more expensive than friend DJs. No exception.

2. Familiarity - Pro DJs should be just that: professional. They will almost certainly not know the marrying couple personally, and for that reason, won't have an intimate knowledge of the reception and the potential guests that will be there. They have to go completely off the must-play/don't-play lists the couple makes beforehand and then read the room once they arrive.

Friend DJ Pros:

1. Familiarity - A repeating point from before, but this is the biggest draw that I can see to having a friend do the DJing. Friends know what kind of music you like, you can implore them to play exactly what you want when you want.

2. Price - Way cheaper than a pro DJ. Obviously.

Friend DJ Cons:

1. Skill - All too often with friend DJs, there are far too many uncomfortable song transitions, and it's almost always due to the fact that the friend is working off either the bride or groom's laptop connected to the PA system, probably playing songs off a playlist made in advance by one of the two that is entitled "Wedding playlist." Friend DJs are usually doing it for the first (and possibly only) time and this lends itself to a fair amount of poor song selections and bad transitions. Doesn't make people want to dance.

2. Equipment - Most friend DJs are first-timers and won't be bringing more than a laptop/iPod to plug into the PA system and going off a pre-made playlist. This won't always be a big deal but if there is a technical issue, they probably won't know how to handle it.

3. Pacing - More having to do with the reception overall than the dance specifically, friend DJs don't often do announcing in a way that makes things flow the best. Wedding guests prefer to know what's going on rather than guessing what's happening when.

4. Groovin' - While I have seen exceptions, most friend DJs just don't know what songs are good dance songs and what are not. It's a very complex art to play songs that will get into people's heads and make them get up and dance and overcome the fear of being judged by other people not dancing, and most friend DJs are first-timers and haven't had practice playing different songs to get people dancing.

So it's obvious from my list that I would go for a pro DJ over a friend DJ. Duh, we had a pro DJ at our wedding and while he wasn't without mistakes, I was way happier with his performance than I would've been with a friend DJ. Not to say I've never seen a friend DJ kill it, but it's such a rare occurrence.

3. Music

Probably the most important aspect of the whole event, because barring a few crazy exceptions, almost any audience can be moved to dance if the right music is played. Great wedding tunes are hard to pin down, but there are some tunes that I've seen fail more than once, and I doubt could ever really work. This is in no way a comprehensive list of songs about which I can opine, but these are the only ones coming to mind this second.

- Party In The U.S.A.

One of those weird songs that is an absolutely great tune, one of the best hooks around when it came out, but I don't personally think it makes the best dance tune. It will certainly get people dancing, which I guess is the ultimate goal of any song played at a dance, but rather than having a killer beat that facilitates fun dancing, it's just a little too slow and ends up leaving the people on the dance floor basically moving slowly and singing the song to each other in order to not feel uncomfortable. So it's not my favorite. But it is a good song to play to attract people to the floor.

- Mambo No. 5

I love this song. Good rhythm, fun melody, it's a great dance tune. And as it's a one-hit wonder, everybody knows it and it will both draw people to the floor and keep them there.

- She Bangs

This is a weird song, because I love it, and I just wish more people enjoyed dancing to it as much as I do. I think it's just barely too fast for its own good.

- Cupid Shuffle/Cha Cha Slide

I've got both love and hate for these tunes. They are reception dance staples, and for that reason lots of people hate them. But they hold so much merit because of how easy they are to pick up and dance along with. People who would never dance will get up and dance because they are being told exactly what to do and can copy everybody else. There is no sense of "everybody's watching me" that often keeps more reserved people off the floor. And if you are a good dancer (Meredith Bell), man these ones are fun to play around with.

- I Gotta Feeling

Another reception dance staple. Not in love with this one, and I think it might have even been played twice at our own reception dance (bad form DJ Tony). But again, the merit is there because it pulls people onto the floor. And it's got a fun kind of message for a reception dance. I'm mainly just annoyed everybody gets excited to dance to a song featuring vocals by Fergie.

- Don't Stop Believin'

I despise this song, and I have always wondered why it would ever show up on a DJ's playlist. I get that everybody knows it and can sing along, but it is, in no imaginable way, a good dance song, and is not even a good closer. People just have to sing it to each other and can hardly move around the floor in an awkward way with this one. So bad.

- Hey Ya!

Another solid hit that's not often thought of to play. Who doesn't love to shake it, sh-shake it, shake it, sh-shake it, shake it, sh-shake it, shake it, shake it, sh-shake it, shake it like a Polaroid picture?

Who the heck knows how to make the dance great? A DJ could play a string of just the best songs you've ever heard, and not get a single butt off their seat and onto the floor. On the other hand, the songs could all suck, and with the right crowd, they will fight through it and enjoy themselves on the floor (see: us at the last wedding we were at). Whatever the case, reception dances are so much fun and a great way to celebrate happy nuptials. I'd only ask for She Bangs to be played more often.

-Jon